New Blog: My Life as a Sissy Wife

Don't forget to check out my other blog where I plan to talk about about how I actually ended up being a sissy wife to a dominant woman! Some of you who look in here may be in the same situation! It's in my blog list but the address is:

About this blog: Do you like to read about my thoughts and experiences and those of the followers, or would you rather it be more X-rated like many other blogs?

Who were you with for your first kiss?

You must be a sissy since you view this blog. So just how little is your little sissy clitty?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Wanting to be a wife

I remember from any early age watching TV and wanting to be like the girl in a movie or show. Not the man, never. And I especially wanted to be like the wife. Like Laura on the Dick van Dyke show!

The people I admired most in my neighborhood were my aunts and the neighbor ladies. Not any man. I just loved how they could be wives and mothers and keep their houses and take care of kids and be just plain loving.

As I grew older, I fantasized about being a man's wife and doing all those things and also doing things for him. I would make sure he got off to work each day with a lunch I packed for him and keep the house neat for him and make sure he had a nice dinner when he came home.

I would keep myself pretty and sweet smelling for him for when he arrived home. I would greet him naked at the door and kiss him and telling him how much I missed him and how I thought of sucking his cock all day. And I would give him a nice loving blowjob before dinner to satisfy my craving.

In the evening, I thought about how I would sit naked at his feet so I could be near him and make sure he had whatever he needed. Or I would massage his feet or give him a nice neck massage. I would fetch him his beer while he watched his sports games, then kneel back down at his feet.

And when it was time for bed. I would orally please him again, worshiping his balls this time and giving his cock even greater pleasure until he rewarded me with another gift of his of cum. And I would give him a massage until he drifted off to sleep.

I drifted off to sleep many nights dreaming about this.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Fitting in

I think in my case that, although I believe sissies are born this way, I tried to fit in with the other boys because that was the way it was supposed to happen. I'm sure many of you can relate to this.

But as I found out that I did not like or I did not do well in certain boy activities or sports, I gravitated to the girl things and I found out that I did like them and did do well in the girl activities.I don't remember one day saying I wanted to be a sissy. It was just nature taking its course.

I felt more natural being around my mother and sisters and aunts and female cousins, maybe in the kitchen or helping out elsewhere in the house. I didn't want to be out there hunting. I did like to fish though! And still do. But then, again, a lot of woman like to fish.

I tried to play some of the boy sports. I was just not very good at them. I don't remember ever being picked last either. I  was sort of athletic, but built more for tennis or swimming because I had skinny arms. Still, being my friends, the boys would let me play -- they just wouldn't get  the ball to me much !

My best friend was a sissy, as I have mentioned. And there were the boys who later were getting BJs from me. They liked me. Some of the boys in my classes liked me. The school jocks did not. But after that, most of my friends were girls. And that has pretty much remained the case up to this day.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Forbidden boy crush

When I started in 7th grade I went to a big high school. We had 1,000 kids in each grade. Not in the school, 1,000 kids in each grade. There were 3,000 kids in the school, grades 7 to 9. So that's a lot of kids and you figure about 1,500 boys to look at.

I had had crushes on boys before, even though I was just 13. My older sister, who was very pretty and popular, would have boys coming around and I was pretty envious of her, but more on that some other time. Starting at age 12, I was "playing house" with another sissy. We would play dress-up and cuddle and kiss each other. And when I was 13, two other boys joined us and we two sissies started giving them blowjobs.

But this was more carrying on and playing and experimenting. I didn't know what it meant to be gay. I thought we were just sissies playing around.

Then, out of the about 1,500 boys in my new school, I saw Pete. And I fell in love. With a boy. He was so pretty. I just wanted to kiss his face all over. And he had pretty lips. As luck would have it, we were on the same course track (gifted or college prep) and we ended up in many of the same classes. I would just melt when I saw him walking around the school or when we were in the classroom together. I could not stop looking at him and would actually get goosebumps. And I thought of him a lot.

Now since we were classmates, he would talk to me. He was so nice. If I was a girl, I would have pursued him definitely. I just wanted to say, "I love you, I love you, I love you" to him, but of course I could not. It was very difficult, as you can imagine.

Then there was the little thing that involved seeing him naked! At this school, we had phys-ed three days a week, two gym classes and one swim class. So I would see him naked in the locker room or shower quite often and he was just so pretty. (He would go on to be star athlete at our high school and in college.) I just wanted to eat  him up after seeing his cock for the first time in that locker room, all I could do was think about it. I was giving some other guys blow jobs, as I said, but what I really wanted was to pleasure him, over and over.

This was very tough and went on for six years! It was a forbidden crush. It was especially tough because we became pretty good friends and yet I could not kiss his lips or pleasure his cock like I was doing a lot of other boys eventually. And I know he knew that I was doing that because secrets aren't kept around a school. The boys who were getting blowjobs from me and my sissy friend were blabbing. And we just known sissies as well. Yet he chose to remain a good friend.

The other thing that was tough was the fact that prettiest girls in school would flock to him. He always had a pretty, popular girl to go steady with. It hurt inside, because I wanted to be that girl so badly and of course I could never be.

I had other crushes on boys, college guys and even older men, but that was the first and most memorable. And I still think about him sometime and pull out the high school yearbook and look at his picture. Don't know what became of him though.

Anyone else have anything thoughts to share about forbidden crushes on boys.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Infatuated by men

When I was about 12 years old, my family belonged to a swim club through my dad's company. Now, I had seen boys my age naked at the Y but not men. The Y had separate locker rooms for boys, girls, men and women. So boys did not undress with the men. I had also seen some of my close friends naked because we were starting to "play house" about that time.

I must have seen naked men when I was younger than 12 at this company pool, but I just don't remember. But then something started to click with me after I started messing around with my friends. I started to notice these men and they excited me in a way I still did not understand.

At 12, I did not know about sucking and fucking. But I did know about hugging and kissing. When I saw these men naked in the locker room all I wanted to do was look at them. And I went to the pool as much as I could and lingered in the locker room and shower so I could see their hairy, masculine bodies and big cocks. I remember trying so hard not to get caught staring!

I was shy and a sissy as a boy, of course. I would lie in bed fantasizing about these men from the locker room. Like I said, I did not know about sucking and fucking at that age, but I would fantasize about these men holding me tight and kissing me or pinning down my weak arms and kissing me. Just holding me and kissing me all night long. I would wish that I could be their girlfriend.

When I became a teenager, I learned from my friends about giving blowjobs and so I fantasized a lot about sucking the cocks of these beautiful men and giving them pleasure over and over. That made my trips to the pool locker room even more exciting!

Friday, September 25, 2009

I wanted to be like my mom

I have to laugh sometimes when people say they remember something that happened to them when they were 3 or 4 years old. I'm certain I did some really girlie things that age, but I cannot tell you that I remember.

Maybe if I had gone to kindergarten I would be remembering things that happened when I was 5. But I did not. Kindergarten was not attended by all kids back in the 60s. Sso the earliest I can think back to is probably age 6 when I was in first grade.

I had two older sisters and of course my mom at home. I do remember seeing them -- my sisters quite by accident -- in various states of undress. I'd go by their open bedroom door sometimes when they were changing and accidentally see that my older sister had little breasts and both were quite different from me down below.

Now my mom was different story altogether. She might be getting dressed after bath and the phone would ring and she would think nothing of going to answer it wearing just panties. Then, not thinking, she would go about doing some other things in the upstairs rooms still wearing just her panties. And I remember what big glorious breasts she had -- with big nipples -- and how I was awestruck when looking at them.

I will not tell you that at age 6 I knew I was transgendered because I did not know what was going on. I do know for sure that I wanted to be like my mom in all ways -- including her body. And like my sisters. And not like my dad.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Why are we the way we are?

I am not a scientist, so I don't know if we are born to be sissies or gay or whatever. I would have to think we were born that way because sometimes it can be a tough life that most people would not choose.

So, whether or not I was born submissive and a sissy, I was certainly raised that way. My father had very little to do with me and my two older sisters. He wasn't really a jerk, but he went his own way. His idea of fun was going out with his buddies hunting, fishing, bowling and a lot of drinking. That was pretty much every night. I don't remember him doing much with my mother as far as going out.

That meant I spent the great majority of my family time with my sisters and mother. Whether I was born to do womanly things, I don't know. But I certainly did enjoy them. I learned to cook, bake, sew, clean, do laundry, etc. and I was really interested it those things and became good at them.

I was not good at "boy" sports such as football, basketball, baseball, hockey. I did have success in tennis and swimming. By the way, you remember in gym class when there were several boys who could not climb the rope? I was one of them. My arms were so girlie skinny that I could not pull myself up!

I grew up in a neighborhood in a small city and most of my Italian aunts lived within walking distance. So my mom, left alone much of the time by my father, would go over to one of their houses. Sometimes there would be a couple of aunts, my sisters, maybe a neighbor lady or two, maybe two or three of my female cousins and a girl that my sisters might have brought along. Plus me.

I spent a lot time with these females. I actually had two male cousins up the hill and they were never there except to maybe come in an say hello and get something to eat. But then they got out of there fast! I stayed. I wanted to be there and I belonged.

We would do more of the things like what I did with my mom and sisters. And they would gossip a lot so it was funny to hear some of that stuff. When you were not supposed to hear something, they started speaking Italian!

But I remember my aunts always complimenting me for being so sweet and gentle. Even when I was a teenager. And I was always known as Stevie. That is not a made-up girlie name. I was always called that because it suited me because I was girlie. I wanted to be like the sweet young lady pictured above!

I remember one time when one of my much older cousins was getting married and one of my aunts made her wedding gown. We all gathered around a room at various times while she tried it on and it was altered and she would try it again. A lot of work was put into it. I helped by fetching things, maybe holding the measuring tape, holding the gown off the floor.

And they made such a fuss over my cousin, telling her what a beautiful bride she was going to be. I was so envious of her!

But those of some of the conditions in which I grew up. I might think of some more later. Do you have anything in your past like that?

Throughout your life as a sissy T-girl, what derogatory name have you been called the most?

Why do your wear bras? Or not?

Ever pilfer panties from a girl's drawer, clothesline or laundry, etc?,

How do you wear your pantyhose?

As a young sissy, did you look at naked men in locker rooms?

Did you ever raid a clothesline for bras or panties?

Do you hate getting erections?

Do you want to have your penis removed?

Do you take female hormones to be more girlie?

What is your mental state as a T-girl who wishes they were a girl?

Do you tuck away your sissy clitty to pretend you are a girl?

Do you wear a bra on a daily basis?

As a t-girl, what do you shave? (Pick closest choice)

What is your favorite lingerie?

You have always wanted one, but what would you call it?

Did you have a crush on a boy when you were in high school?

When you see a gorgeous girl, do you want to:

At this exact second, what are you wearing?

Do you use feminine protection?

Who was the first female you envied and wanted to be like?

Growing up, did you place dress-up with a sissy friend?

Did you play with dolls like Barbie and Tammy as a young sissy?