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Monday, November 16, 2009

Forbidden boy crush

When I started in 7th grade I went to a big high school. We had 1,000 kids in each grade. Not in the school, 1,000 kids in each grade. There were 3,000 kids in the school, grades 7 to 9. So that's a lot of kids and you figure about 1,500 boys to look at.

I had had crushes on boys before, even though I was just 13. My older sister, who was very pretty and popular, would have boys coming around and I was pretty envious of her, but more on that some other time. Starting at age 12, I was "playing house" with another sissy. We would play dress-up and cuddle and kiss each other. And when I was 13, two other boys joined us and we two sissies started giving them blowjobs.

But this was more carrying on and playing and experimenting. I didn't know what it meant to be gay. I thought we were just sissies playing around.

Then, out of the about 1,500 boys in my new school, I saw Pete. And I fell in love. With a boy. He was so pretty. I just wanted to kiss his face all over. And he had pretty lips. As luck would have it, we were on the same course track (gifted or college prep) and we ended up in many of the same classes. I would just melt when I saw him walking around the school or when we were in the classroom together. I could not stop looking at him and would actually get goosebumps. And I thought of him a lot.

Now since we were classmates, he would talk to me. He was so nice. If I was a girl, I would have pursued him definitely. I just wanted to say, "I love you, I love you, I love you" to him, but of course I could not. It was very difficult, as you can imagine.

Then there was the little thing that involved seeing him naked! At this school, we had phys-ed three days a week, two gym classes and one swim class. So I would see him naked in the locker room or shower quite often and he was just so pretty. (He would go on to be star athlete at our high school and in college.) I just wanted to eat  him up after seeing his cock for the first time in that locker room, all I could do was think about it. I was giving some other guys blow jobs, as I said, but what I really wanted was to pleasure him, over and over.

This was very tough and went on for six years! It was a forbidden crush. It was especially tough because we became pretty good friends and yet I could not kiss his lips or pleasure his cock like I was doing a lot of other boys eventually. And I know he knew that I was doing that because secrets aren't kept around a school. The boys who were getting blowjobs from me and my sissy friend were blabbing. And we just known sissies as well. Yet he chose to remain a good friend.

The other thing that was tough was the fact that prettiest girls in school would flock to him. He always had a pretty, popular girl to go steady with. It hurt inside, because I wanted to be that girl so badly and of course I could never be.

I had other crushes on boys, college guys and even older men, but that was the first and most memorable. And I still think about him sometime and pull out the high school yearbook and look at his picture. Don't know what became of him though.

Anyone else have anything thoughts to share about forbidden crushes on boys.

1 comment:

jl said...

A sweet, sad and frequent least for many sissies all over the world.

Throughout your life as a sissy T-girl, what derogatory name have you been called the most?

Why do your wear bras? Or not?

Ever pilfer panties from a girl's drawer, clothesline or laundry, etc?,

How do you wear your pantyhose?

As a young sissy, did you look at naked men in locker rooms?

Did you ever raid a clothesline for bras or panties?

Do you hate getting erections?

Do you want to have your penis removed?

Do you take female hormones to be more girlie?

What is your mental state as a T-girl who wishes they were a girl?

Do you tuck away your sissy clitty to pretend you are a girl?

Do you wear a bra on a daily basis?

As a t-girl, what do you shave? (Pick closest choice)

What is your favorite lingerie?

You have always wanted one, but what would you call it?

Did you have a crush on a boy when you were in high school?

When you see a gorgeous girl, do you want to:

At this exact second, what are you wearing?

Do you use feminine protection?

Who was the first female you envied and wanted to be like?

Growing up, did you place dress-up with a sissy friend?

Did you play with dolls like Barbie and Tammy as a young sissy?