|It would have been nice to play dress-up with the girls!|
As I mentioned before, they would confide in you with their secrets when you talked and a lot of times that talk would take place right in their bedrooms. I remember girls' moms having no problem whatsoever if I went up to their high school daughters' bedrooms because these moms knew that I was not going to try anything and it was pretty much like their daughters just having a girlfriend up to their bedrooms.
Oh, and these moms, like my aunts in the neighborhood, were constantly telling how sweet and gentle I was to my mom and dad and that I was welcome to come over anytime. My mom appreciated that and my dad would get pissed.
So, if you were like me, these girls wanted to be around you like a girlfriend. Did they want to date you? No friggin way! You probably found that out also, didn't you? They might go to a movie with you, but it was not a date. They would go to the movie with real boys and make out with them during and after the movie.
Then maybe they would tell you about it the next day. All the juicy details! How the boy might have felt up the girl's tits and put his hand down her pants and diddled her while they were necking. How if they were especially close she gave him a blow job in the car. Many of you know exactly what I am talking about, don't you?
And my feelings would really be muddled. On one hand, I wanted to be the real boy with the girl. But actually, I envied the girl who was WITH the boy! In high school, I would give guys blowjobs, but of course I was not a girl, just the sissy faggot that those boys took advantage of to get some kicks when the real girls were not putting out for them.
I am not lamenting about that. That made me VERY VERY happy to pleasure those boys, even if they were taking advantage of me. As you know, what was tough was not being a REAL girl like those girls that you were friends with.
Being around those pretty girls a lot and seeing them in their undies and hearing their secrets and their experiences with the cute boys just made me want to be girl like them so much more. And of course you know that that hurt, because that was something that I could not have.
What are your thoughts and experiences?