New Blog: My Life as a Sissy Wife

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Monday, August 13, 2012

Coming out experiences or thoughts?

I could not imagine my father knowing
that I was like this and that I was
sucking cocks as a teen.
I was reading some things around the Internet about reactions that people got when they came out to their family that they were either gay or transgendered. Some "coming outs" were quite without incident and some ended up quite badly. I saw some accounts where the person, mostly boys, were disowned or even physically harmed by the dad.

I actually did not have an "official" coming out. I did not go to my parents and say "I'm gay!" I did not blurt out "I want to be a girl" or "I love wearing girls clothes." Just did not happen.

But my parents could tell, I am sure. I was quite a sissy growing up and even in my pre-teen photos you could see it in me. And my mother even caught me in my room in one of my sister's dresses when was around 12 or 13 so I am sure she told my dad what she saw. I guess I never really knew for sure though.

But it was quite evident. I was a loner mostly. I was not good at boy sports, but I was good at girl activities. I had close friends that were girls and we did things together, but never a girlfriend. I began shaving my legs when I was 13 or so. Hard to miss that.

My parents could not have known that I was regularly playing dress-up with another sissy, unless my sissy friend's mom found out and told them. They could not have know that I was giving blowjobs to boys.

So I was wondering what would have happened if I had had an actual coming out incident:

My dad: I think he would have disowned me, right after smacking me around. I am pretty sure of this. He came from a macho man family and grew up in a macho neighborhood. He already was distant from me because of what a sissy I was. If I had come out and said I was gay as a teen, that would have meant that I enjoyed sucking cocks. That I was already sucking cocks at that age and that I needed to suck more cocks. That would have absolutely made him flip out on me. His macho friends knowing about me would have really pissed him off.

My mother: She would have just been resigned to it since she saw me in that dress. But that is a huge step between seeing that and knowing that I was a cocksucker. She would have had trouble worrying about what her friends thought and what the ladies at church thought once the word got around that I was gay. And of course it would have occurred to people that gay sissies are cocksuckers and that they take cocks up the ass. I mean everyone knows that is what gay sissies do.

So I did not actually have a coming out moment, but my mother knew what I was up to and I have to think my dad did too. I'm sure they talked about me and figured it out because they were not dumb people.

My dad really had nothing to do with me but he was not mean to me. He still provided for me. He got sick and died when I was 24. I still have my mother and she has seen me for many years with my shaved legs and the way I dress and the way I carry on in feminine ways. She has never had a problem with the way I am. And my siblings have not either.

Did you have a coming out experience as either being gay or transgendered? What happened? If you were like me, what do you think would have happened?


Just Sissy said...

Coming out is very difficult. I had my coming out with lots of friends, with colleagues, and most important: with my wife... most of them were very open, only some of my "friends" never showed up since...

My Wife... she found her Counterpart in me... she is the Yin to my Yang.

My kids know a part: my love for shoes and girlie fashion, and every day they see a little more... I think since they have seen me wearing a skirt... the know more than they talk about.

My parents: I will not tell them, but if my mother should ever ask about my shaved legs, my painted toe nails, my anklet... I will answer her: "You always said, I should do anything, to make my wife happy,... do you really want to know what makes her happy?" ... hope she'll be able to answer - or I'll cal the ambulance.

Staci lewiS said...

omg girl, i so totally understand, as i too, have worn the shoe or heel so to speak. i've been out for so long, that the cobbwebbs are clustering.
recently had my identity taken, which only causes more grief to the cause. if i only knew who, maybe it would somehow be easier to except.;)

but, i've lost jobs in the past over this, as well as friends n family. still continue hormone therapy, as it makes me feel better inside.

if ever you need to vent or just chat. please feel free.
hugs n kisses

Throughout your life as a sissy T-girl, what derogatory name have you been called the most?

Why do your wear bras? Or not?

Ever pilfer panties from a girl's drawer, clothesline or laundry, etc?,

How do you wear your pantyhose?

As a young sissy, did you look at naked men in locker rooms?

Did you ever raid a clothesline for bras or panties?

Do you hate getting erections?

Do you want to have your penis removed?

Do you take female hormones to be more girlie?

What is your mental state as a T-girl who wishes they were a girl?

Do you tuck away your sissy clitty to pretend you are a girl?

Do you wear a bra on a daily basis?

As a t-girl, what do you shave? (Pick closest choice)

What is your favorite lingerie?

You have always wanted one, but what would you call it?

Did you have a crush on a boy when you were in high school?

When you see a gorgeous girl, do you want to:

At this exact second, what are you wearing?

Do you use feminine protection?

Who was the first female you envied and wanted to be like?

Growing up, did you place dress-up with a sissy friend?

Did you play with dolls like Barbie and Tammy as a young sissy?