New Blog: My Life as a Sissy Wife

Don't forget to check out my other blog where I plan to talk about about how I actually ended up being a sissy wife to a dominant woman! Some of you who look in here may be in the same situation! It's in my blog list but the address is:

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Who were you with for your first kiss?

You must be a sissy since you view this blog. So just how little is your little sissy clitty?

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Really missed that affection!

When I was a sissy T-girl in high school and college I gave a lot blow jobs! I am not complaining about that! It was something that suited me and I yearned for as you well know yourself I am sure!

It would have been nice to cuddle guys like
this after pleasuring them!
But these BJs occurred not in a nice warm bed, but in a garage used for a drinking place, a big closet at a party, maybe in a vehicle, maybe outside somewhere. You know all the obvious places where sissies give BJs.

Thinking back now, what I really missed was affection. Not "love" from the guy I was pleasuring, just some affection. Sure these guys liked me because I was giving them blow jobs. But they did not really like me for any other reason.

How nice it would have been to make out with a guy naked in bed, pleasure his cock, swallow his load, keep licking his balls as he came down from his orgasm. But then stay there in bed with him! Kissing him! Caressing him! Cuddling him! Talking! Spending the night with him and holding him all night long!

You know, I cannot remember more than two guys that I ever spent quality time such as this with. Not counting my sissy friend that I would play house with and do a lot of cuddling with! I really missed such interaction.

Sometimes I feel really sad thinking back about how -- outside of relatives -- there really were not a lot people who ever loved me or even showed affection toward me. But I guess such is the life of a sissy or anyone who is different in some way.

Did anyone else find this to be true?


Billie said...


I was "loved" only by my mother. The boys in my schools only liked me for the "other things" I did!

Stevie Stevens said...

Billie, I understand what you are talking about. I guess I knew a lot of people in school, but I was awfully lonely somehow. The other sissies were my friends and a few girls, but the boys did not want you around unless you did stuff for them as you said.

Scott K said...

An enjoyable post as always Stevie. I think this is the seconds most important thing, just lying in each other arms and enjoying each other after a hot session . Truly a good way to appreciate each other.

JinianVictoria said...

Absolutely Iwanted it but i never got enough of it either

Aza said...

You've echoed exactly the ONLY reason I turned down nearly all the offers I got (and when I was high school and college-ages, believe me, there were no shortage of guys wanting blow jobs and other stuff from me).

I said yes to one only, and that encounter did take place in my bed in an Army barracks where, due to my rank at the time, I had a room entirely to myself, decorated (I know it's hard to believe, but it's true) with pink sheets and as femme a decorating scheme as I felt I could get away with in the era before Clinton's disgusting "don't ask, don't tell" compromise. At that time I would guess than at least 10% and probably over 20% of the cismales in my unit were gay, bi or something other than boring straights.

That one night stand was followed by a fairly queer relationship (including children and me taking on the role of "mommy" to the degree possible without hormones and transition) that lasted 16 years, and remains an unresolved friendship where I keep hoping my ex will own her own sense of queerness and beg me back into her bed.

Meanwhile, a guy I've known for many years has been coming on to me and even though I do have my own bed, and have cuddled and engaged with him on my own terms I find it unsatisfying, mainly because I can't see any real future in it... he wants sex, I want relationships and the kind of long-term intimacy that requires being in continuous contact... he's paranoid about being found out, with good reason, I suppose. But it's not a turn on for me.

Seems to me many women and femmedykes of all sexes will say yes when for their own good they should maybe trust their intuitions and be a bit more resistant. It's an ego boost to be wanted, I'll admit, especially when you've lived with a situation where what you want doesn't come along that often (especially if you find it difficult to negotiate the issues of desiring to be passive, to be pursued rather than pursuer... that's hard enough when you have an unambiguously female body, so I can understand how much more difficult it can be when most of those pursuing you are doing it to get at your boy bits, or to have their own treated with gentle passion.

Only you can decide how to negotiate this, and how to open up when there's this sense that coming out can be threatening, and not necessarily get you any dates from those you wish would pursue you.

Just some rambling thoughts.

sissydoll said...

So true Stevie. Like you I only enjoyed the cuddling and love very few times. Particularly with one lover who always made me feel so girly and loved before, during and after. Unfortunately at that time I was struggling with my sissyness and I let him get away. Something I´ve regretted all my life. BTW, lovely pictures... And about the first one, seems like he's ready for a second round... Lucky girl!

Stevie Stevens said...

Yes, there is something really great about being all smooth like a girl and smelling so sweet and holding onto a manly man that you just pleasured! Mmmm, I have great thoughts of that!

Jenna said...

Same here Stevie. You were lucky to have had the cuddling experience even a couple times. After pleasing my partners in high school and college, I was typically shown the way out immediately. Very sad when you put all your heart and warmth into making a guy feel so good - only to be dismissed so easily.

eleventhdr said...

oh yes just to be feeling so safe and comfortable all warm and soft in bed with either sex but mostly with other girl's for me i would just have to be lesbian once i am finally a girl!

eleventhdr said...

yes i know this feeling only to well very few people in my life have ever just come out and said that they loved me

that is why i wish i had been born a girl in another time and place!

so that maybe i might have known real true love and not be so empty wanting this kind of acceptance love and understanding

it really hurt's way down deep never knowing this kind of love!

i want to share it but i just do not know how to anymore

i would love to have just one person really love me unconditioal!

Throughout your life as a sissy T-girl, what derogatory name have you been called the most?

Why do your wear bras? Or not?

Ever pilfer panties from a girl's drawer, clothesline or laundry, etc?,

How do you wear your pantyhose?

As a young sissy, did you look at naked men in locker rooms?

Did you ever raid a clothesline for bras or panties?

Do you hate getting erections?

Do you want to have your penis removed?

Do you take female hormones to be more girlie?

What is your mental state as a T-girl who wishes they were a girl?

Do you tuck away your sissy clitty to pretend you are a girl?

Do you wear a bra on a daily basis?

As a t-girl, what do you shave? (Pick closest choice)

What is your favorite lingerie?

You have always wanted one, but what would you call it?

Did you have a crush on a boy when you were in high school?

When you see a gorgeous girl, do you want to:

At this exact second, what are you wearing?

Do you use feminine protection?

Who was the first female you envied and wanted to be like?

Growing up, did you place dress-up with a sissy friend?

Did you play with dolls like Barbie and Tammy as a young sissy?